the cupboard
by flower7052
Summary: A cupboard generally seems like a good place to hide from whatever is bothering you but it tends to get more stressful the more people are in there. General stupidity and sarcasm ensues. Set in school and as you can probably tell is mostly set in a small cupboard.


_**I'm going on holiday so this is my little 'sorry you won't be getting any more chapters for a while' present! Hope you all like it!**_

Heavy footsteps and deep breaths reverberated of the walls as Gilbert ran down the school corridor and skidded around the corner. Crimson eyes darted around the white walls, metal lockers and assorted clubs posters as he looked for a way to escape the incredibly angry principle and a furious counsellor who he could hear running after him. He didn't get their problem but apparently complementing your counsellor's breasts, wolf whistling at teachers and then slapping the Principles bum does actually count as harassment for some strange reason. Slowing down slightly, Gilbert now saw only two options; he could try and blend in the music class at the end of the corridor or he could climb out of the window. He scratched the back of his head and started running full speed at the class then, suddenly, he stopped and turned. A cupboard. What a wonderful idea that would be! Hell, he could spend the rest of the day there! As the two teachers, now panting and doing little more than a limping jog, rounded the corner, Gilbert threw open the brown door and flung himself into the small space, letting the door shut behind him.

Resting his head back against the shelves, the Prussian sunk into a slouched sitting position and let his eyes adjust to the hazy darkness. It was then a dim torch light flicked on in his face "what the hell!?"

"It's you. Damn it." Squinting red eyes met dull indigo ones before the light was switched off with a huff.

"who the fuck did you expect Roderich? And why the hell are you in here? Nearly gave me a heart attack…" Shifting uncomfortably, Gilbert scowled through the darkness at the fellow teen and tried to grab the torch which was then held back further then he could reach. "I didn't feel like going to music class. None of them know what real music is and I only get 5 minutes on the piano. It's barely worth it." Roderich pulled a heavy book from his lap and placed it on the floor with the torch "I take it the principle finally discovered your harassment campaign"

"It's not harassment"

"then what is?"  
"physical appreciation of other people's bodies"

"Right" The silence was deafening as both boys tried to shift to opposite corners of the dusty, book filled space they had unwillingly ended up sharing. A clatter of footsteps and muffled swearing rang out in the hall as Gilbert held a finger to his lips and raised his eyebrows. The door slammed open then closed and a chorus of screams rang out as Roderich turned the torch on. Wide eyed with messy hair stood Lovino, panting with his back against the closed door. The three stayed there screaming until Gilbert threw the torch and the cupboard was plunged back into darkness. Outside, hushed voices gathered in the corridor, each with their own puzzled tone until they all slowly dispersed again. "Hey, Lovi! Why you here? Thought you'd already come out the closet!" the white haired teen chuckled at his own joke and then stopped abruptly when he realised no one else was laughing "Closet? Gay? No? Ok then"

"I'm here because Antonio won't stop hugging me and I need a fucking break. He has had gym. He stinks. He is rubbing his smell onto me. These clothes cost a fortune; I will not have them ruined by Spanish sweat" Lovino clenched his hands into fists and sat cross legged in the unoccupied corner to the left of the door "and now I find a hiding spot and it's got two German bastards in it. Just my luck"

"Actually I'm Prussian" Gilbert raised his hand to which Roderich added "and actually I am Austrian"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever, still bastards" Glancing from one to the other, the small Italian then added "what were you doing anyway?"

The brunette sighed and let his head hit back against the wall "he has been hitting on teachers again and I don't want to go to class"

"All normal then." Another silence fell over the trio as they all tried to avoid physical or eye contact with each other. This resulted in a short kicking match which turned into a poor excuse for slap fight which was finished when a book was thrown at the pair by Roderich. The silence droned on for a short while until the door swung open without warning and someone else stepped inside, tripped over Gilbert's legs and landed on Roderich's lap. As the door closed, the newest teen let out a scream which was cut off when three people covered his mouth and raised their fingers to their lips. As the hands were returned to their previous positions, a panting voice hissed "what the bloody hell was that for and what the fuck is going on in here!?"

"You found the top secret 'we don't give a shit about school club'. We had to stop you drawing attention to our meeting spot" Lovino folded his arms and lent back.

"And this 'club' comprises of who exactly?" the Brit brushed himself off and shuffled awkwardly to the last free corner to the right of the door.

"2 german bastards and me"

"Can you be more specific?"

"Fuck face 1, fuck face 2 and me?" Lovino smirked as Gilbert kicked him again and then settled back down in the corner.

"I shall take that as a no then" Arthur fiddled with the hem of his shirt as his eyes adjusted to the dark then inquired "none of you seen Francis?"

"Nah, francie pants had cooking; he's nowhere near here." The Prussian's head tilted to one side and he swivelled around to face the new guest "coming to think of it, you had cooking too. What happened? Spill"

"I may or may not have set fire to the toaster and France got very, shall we say, distressed"

"Distressed?"

"You're not a flipping echo Gil! Yes distressed; he ripped his shirt off and started crying again"

There was nothing more that could be said about the last statement unless they really wanted the conversation to turn strange and, considering they were in a very small space, none of them really did. Yet again the silence returned only to be occasionally interrupted by murmured cursing and complaints about the burnt smell.

Humming rose from the other side of the door as the four teens shuffled further into their corners. As the door was inched open, the blonde flung himself onto the nearest person's lap and looped his arms around their neck. This person was the Prussian who had been asleep and yelped at sudden presence of someone on his legs. The door was now thrown open and a shirtless Francis appeared in the light from the hall.

"oh my god it's just like that porno I saw" Roderich's eyes widened as Gilbert wrapped an arm around his company and replied "what?"

"Oh, fuck, never meant to say that out loud. Nothing; you heard nothing" the Violet eyed brunette bit his lip and shook his head. That wouldn't be let go of easily.

Stepping into the room and letting go of the door, a chuckle escaped Francis' lips as he sat down next to Gilbert and rested his head on his shoulder. "Well then, what have we got here?"

"Personal space issues, that's what. Francie move your head, Artie move your ass."

"You hugged me"

"You sat on me, now move back to your corner!"

As more awkward shuffling ensued Francis Leant back against the door and eyed up the four carefully in the grey light. When everyone finally seemed settled again the newest blonde piped up "so what exactly is happening in here?"

"We have decided to run a miniature strip club in the cupboard – what do you think?" Arthur flashed a death glare to the teen who either didn't see it or chose to ignore it as he replied with "sounds like a wonderful idea!"

"oi, Francis" Lovino whispered from his area near the door "what's the deal with the toaster issue?"

A sulky hum rang out as the newest blonde shuffled next to the Italian "he set fire to Louis"

"Who's Louis?"

"My favourite toaster! Puff and it was just smoke and flames! I took my shirt off to try and save it but then I burnt off my chest hair. Want to feel?" Francis pouted and lent into Lovino who pushed him away.

As the final school bell rang, the inhabitants of the cupboard looked at each other in confusion. A buzz of 'what do we do now?', 'how do we get out?' and the like followed until Roderich spoke up again; "I say we all just walk out normally, like nothing has happened." The buzz of voices rose until everyone just nodded and slowly stood, lined up, opened the door and filled out. The door swung closed behind the five and as they turned to the end of the hall they noticed a row comprising of 1 crying Antonio, 1 angry principle with counsellor and 1 tired looking music teacher.

"I've changed my mind" Roderich gulped "is it too late to go back in the cupboard?"


End file.
